Oak Park ain't Mayberry. It has it's fair share of crime. Enough to give this granola village a little street cred. Last night around 1:45 a.m. I heard glass crashing...and then again. Seconds later Jerry and I were standing in our alley to further assess the situation with the police on the phone. Now I watch Forensic Files and consider myself a bit of an expert on police work.
Officer Oak Park: So did you witness anyone out in the alley?
Barney Fife: Yes.
Officer Oak Park: Height and weight?
Barney Fife: I don't know, he was riding a bike.
Officer Oak Park: What age?
Barney Fife: Somewhere under 65.
Officer Oak Park: What color top was he wearing?
Barney Fife: I don't know, dark? (Don't criminals always wear dark colors?)
Officer Oak Park: What about pants?
Barney Fife: Geez, I have no clue! Aren't you supposed to be calling Grissom and taking finger prints by now? We're losing precious time!
The assailants ended up vandalizing three cars in total. Some may blame misguided youth, others may point the finger at summer-time boredom. In this town though, it could very likely be a frustrated response to critics of the Obama health plan. Kids.
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